Painting the Town Red and Green
by Ommy
Summary: Two eccentric fanfiction.net authors end up travelling to Odaiba as a prize in a contest. However, what kinds of mayhem will they cause with the 01/02 gang in tow? How will their presence effect the kids? (some Takari)
1. Departure for Parts Well Known

Well this is my first seasonal story, and it's a Digimon one at that. Isn't that wonderful? I also find it interesting that this is my first official humour story. I didn't realize that I was overly serious when it came to writing! Well to those of you who do not know, I _do_ have a witty sense of humour...usually.

My primary motive for writing this little ditty is because it's actually a Christmas present to one of my good buds on FF.net, Cracker. It's rather scary how the two of us are so similar to each other (laziness for life!).

The story will be a Takari (perhaps cliché at times, but I do like adding my personal flavour to this favourite couple), but I will also insert myself and Cracker into the story - thus giving it an original flair a lot of times. Two wacky Torontonians placed in Japan equals hilarity that is bound to ensue! We've kept our real names secret (although my name is not so secret) mostly for comedic purposes. We shall still be referred to as our respective pennames.

...and yes, we can be wacky! You'll see!

Disclaimer: My New Years resolution will be to make all of my subsequent disclaimers about me not owning Digimon actually funny. Yeah right, like that will happen!

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**Painting the Town Red...and Green**

It was a frigid December 21 in Toronto, Ontario. This Saturday experienced a hefty snowfall in the waking hours of the morning. The sub-zero wind that blew violently caused the temperature of -17°C to feel like -37°C. In other words, it was a typical Canadian winter day.

In the house of a quiet Scarborough neighbourhood, a groggy, 18-year-old, young man awoke from his hibernation. He was tall - about 6'3" - and had tanned brown skin. He squinted his deep brown eyes as he adjusted to the sunlight shining in his bedroom window. He ran his hand through his short, spiky, black and brown hair, which he noticed had flattened on the left side due to the fact that he usually kept his head very firmly on the pillow for an over-extended period of time. He inwardly cursed at this. He looked out of his window to see how much snow had fallen overnight. Much to his dismay, it was a lot.

"Looks like I'm going to have to clean the driveway." He muttered to himself. "How I hate winter."

After getting dressed and ready for the day, the young man noticed that it was already 2PM. As usual, he had overslept. As he walked down the stairs, as if on cue his father came in through the garage door dressed in a large, winter coat, and handed him a shovel. He dejectedly took the tool and got his coat.

After the laborious task was complete, the young man trudged back into the house and went to the nearest sink to defrost his icy fingers. He temporarily bothered his younger sister by logging her off of her MSN account so he could check his email. The young teenage girl yelled some obscenities at him for severing her conversation with her countless friends, but he disregarded the slanderous remarks.

The young man quickly grabbed the car keys to the family's black Toyota Camry in the kitchen after having a quick meal. Today he was heading to the mall to make some late gift purchases. His parents had warned him about late shopping numerous amounts of times, but being the exceptionally lazy person that he is, the young man waits until almost the last minute to do virtually anything.

The garage door started sticking as he opened it. He rolled his eyes. He began fidgeting with the button so that it would jerk farther open with every push. After winning the gradual, minute-long battle with the door, he headed out to the car. As he got inside, his hands froze up again as he placed them on the steering wheel. He started the car, and allowed it to warm up a few minutes before heading out to the mall.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The Scarborough Town Centre proved to be packed beyond usual capacity. The young man made his way through the mass, as he started to admonish himself for buying presents so late. As he came out of one of the big department stores, he saw a huge crowd gathered around a kiosk with several posters of Japan decorating it. He curiously made his way to the stand. At the booth there were two Japanese lottery wheels where several people were drawing balls.

He was intrigued by this, being a fan of anime and Japanese culture, so he decided to enter - even though he was unaware of the prize. He filled out a card, but decided to use his common nickname, Ominous, when he filled in the name. He didn't think he was going to win, so it didn't matter that much to him.

Ominous handed the card to one of the dressed-up operators and got a weird look from the man when he inspected the name. The operator shrugged and spun the wheel a few times. After it stopped, Ominous reached in and pulled out a ball. When he unclasped his fist, a shiny, gold ball was present. The crowd's eyes went wide, as did the eyes of the operator. Ominous was still clueless.

"What? Did I win something?" Ominous asked, indifferently. The operator rang a bell.

"Attention everyone!" He shouted. "We have ourselves the first winner!" He read the card and sighed. "Congratulations...Ominous..."

"Really? Wow! What did I win?" Ominous asked, perking up.

"You won the grand prize, sir." The older man stated. "An all-expenses paid, 5-day trip to Japan!"

"WHAT?!?!" Ominous exclaimed.

"That's right!" Said the operator. "You'll be staying at a four-star hotel in the heart of Odaiba, complete with a first class, round-trip ticket. You will be travelling alongside the second winner of the draw."

Ominous was completely stupefied. He was about to faint, but he heard the bell ring from the second stand.

"We have our second winner!" The other official announced. "Congratulations...Cracker..."

Ominous' eyes went wide once more. There was only one person in all of Toronto that he knew had that nickname, and would have the nerve to use it here. He rushed over to the other side to see who he expected. She was short with fair skin, and medium-length black hair - Ominous' online pal, and author partner in crime.

"So it is you, Cracker!" Ominous called out. Cracker looked at Ominous and displayed the golden ball that she pulled from the drum.

"Looks like I'm coming with you to Japan!" She smiled. They shared a brief, friendly hug mostly out of excitement for one another's luck.

"What are you doing here in Scarborough?" Ominous asked. "This is a bit out of your way."

"Well I heard about this draw for some time now." She answered. "Didn't you?" Ominous shook his head.

"I just saw it as I came in, so I thought I'd give it a try." Ominous responded. "Who knew it would pay off? And here I was thinking it was going to be another dull day today."

"Tell me about it." Cracker added. "I'd hate to think about how I did in my calculus exam."

"Don't remind me." Ominous shuddered.

"Here are your tickets, you two." The official interrupted. "I suggest you both get packing. Your flight is tomorrow afternoon." Cracker and Ominous quickly did a double-take and blinked.

"Tomorrow?!" They yelped in unison.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The following afternoon at Pearson International Airport, the two friends met up at their flight gate. They put their hand-luggage down and took a seat by the window.

"So what did you parents think about the prize?" Ominous first asked.

"They were in disbelief to say the least." Cracker replied. "I had told them about the contest, but they didn't expect me to win. Luckily my mom and my sister were able to get me packed in a hurry. What about you?"

"Well, like I said, I had no clue about the contest." Ominous answered. "It took a bit of convincing on my part for my mom to be alright with it. She tends to be very overprotective." Cracker chuckled at this. "Thankfully though, she allowed me to go, since she knew that this was a rare opportunity, but she still made me feel guilty about missing Christmas with my family."

"Typical mom, huh!" Cracker joked. Ominous smiled and nodded.

"I'm completely dependent on my mom when it comes to packing." Ominous added. "Thankfully she's done it so many times, it barely took her any effort. I still find her ability to pack so much into so little a space to be a mystery. It boggles the mind."

"_Attention. Air Canada Flight 482 to Odaiba, Japan is now ready for pre-boarding._" Said the woman on the intercom. "_All first-class ticket holders and those with small children or those who require help will be asked to board at this time..._"

"Well it looks like we're ready to go." Cracker motioned as the two got up from their seats.

"This should be an interesting experience." Ominous stated. "Remember that you're supposed to drive on the _left_-hand side of the road over there!" Cracker and Ominous had joked several times about their...eccentric driving behaviour, so they found this rather funny.

"I'm not making any promises, Om, remember that!" Cracker jested. "Now let's go before they leave without us." Ominous nodded.

"So what do you want to do for the eighteen hours that we're on the plane?" Ominous inquired.

"I don't know, but I call the window seat!" Cracker announced as she rushed off to board.

"HEY!" Ominous shouted as he started running after her. "I wanted the window seat!"

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To be continued...

So far, this is just the introduction of me and Cracker, as well as the reason why we are heading to the land of the rising sun. In the next chapter, you shall see some familiar characters that our delirious duo are going to run into during their vacation. The madness continues later on!

As always, review and share your thoughts.


	2. Beware, Odaiba!

The Christmas tale continues...

Disclaimer: Differentiate my lack of ownership of Digimon, with respect to my insanity, evaluated at incoherence. The answer to that is one giant migraine. (I'm such a geek!)

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After the the 'fasten seatbelts' sign came off, and the plane was level after takeoff, Cracker and Ominous began chatting with between themselves. Their most pressing topic was what they were going to do for the eighteen hours that they were going to have to endure.

Cracker had successfully attained the coveted window seat, much to Ominous' chagrin, but the young man didn't take it to heart. He knew that even if he had won the race, Cracker would have somehow found some other method of taking it from him. She knew that he acted chivalrous above all things, so he would have handed it over to her. Ominous was in a no-win scenario.

"Thank God we got first-class tickets for an extended flight like this." Ominous noted. "My legs are too long for my body, and I would have been cramped in the regular seats. Sometimes it's a pain being tall."

"If I didn't know any better, I'd swear you were trying to mock my height!" Cracker jokingly retorted. Ominous chuckled at this remark.

"Oh no, you're on to me!" Ominous said as he shifted his eyes in a fake sinister fashion.

"Heh, so what do you think we can do in the mean time?" Cracker inquired. Ominous reached into his hand-luggage and produced two GameBoy Advances linked together with a black cable.

"What else?" Ominous rhetorically asked. "I've got tons of batteries, and several games we can play." He handed her one of the two portable devices.

"Sounds good to me." Cracker stated. "I hope you like to lose, because it's going to happen _very_ often."

"Bring it on!" Ominous boldly said. They turned on the miniature systems and began their competition. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

After nine hours of non-stop gaming - with occasional breaks for food and trips to the bathroom - the two friends had passed out from mental exhaustion. They showed no signs of awakening from their slumber. Their GameBoys had fallen to the floor and were losing battery power.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

When the two had stirred to life again, the plane was in the process of landing. Ominous groggily checked his watch. As soon as he saw the time, his eyes bulged wide open.

"WE WERE ASLEEP FOR NINE HOURS?!" He exclaimed. "That's just typical!"

"Well, at least we're here in Japan." Cracker yawned. "Come on, let's get our stuff and head out."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

After they had collected their luggage, phoned their parents, and gotten the keys to their rental car, the two headed out to the airport garage.

"So what kind of car did we get?" Cracker asked. Ominous checked the tag.

"It's a silver Suzuki Aerio Sedan." Ominous read. As they looked around, they noticed that almost all the cars in the vicinity fit that description. The two of them sweatdropped. "Ah, nuts...Suzuki just _had_ to be the most popular car in this country."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

After combing through the garage for several minutes, the couple finally found their car, and placed their luggage in the trunk. Ominous looked over the map for the directions to the hotel.

"So which one of us is going to drive?" Cracker inquired.

"Well I have a pretty good sense of direction, but it's better if I'm giving direction from the passenger seat, so the driving is up to you, I guess." Ominous replied as he tossed her the keys. "I hope it won't be too difficult for you to get used to having the wheel on the right side." Cracker stuck out her tongue at him as the young man went back to looking at the map. She had opened the wrong door, so she quickly shut it and ran over to the correct side before Ominous could notice.

The two of them got in the vehicle, and put on their seatbelts. Ominous laid the map before him on his side of the dashboard as Cracker started the car. The car backed out of the spot, and the two were on their way.

"I do hope you remember to keep on the left side..." Ominous remarked. He quickly felt the swift strike of a fist colliding with his shoulder. "Hey!"

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

After half an hour, the duo arrived at the hotel. It was an elegant, five-star building in the heart of the city. The hotel was draped in Christmas colours and ornaments. A giant tree was placed outside. They parked the car and headed to the lobby with their bags.

"Well you narrowly missed colliding with only one car." Ominous remarked. "That must be a record for you."

"It is, actually." Cracker confirmed. "I didn't even swear or cut anyone off, so that's a first. However, it's a shame we got a little lost."

"We did not get lost!" Ominous shot back. "I pointed out the direction, but you were driving too fast to notice." He sighed. "What's important is that we're here. We can put that whole mishap behind us."

They checked in with the concierge and got their room keys. Their rooms were close to the top floor, allowing for a clear view of Odaiba. They were next to one another and were internally connected through a door. Each room was a large suite and featured a small kitchen, a sitting area with a television set, a bathroom, and a bedroom.

"Nice." Chimed the both of them. They put their suitcases in the closets and freshened up. Afterwards they both began planning what they would do during their stay.

"Well since we don't know a lot about the city, I think we should just go out for a walk right now to get an idea of what the area is like." Ominous suggested.

"Sounds like a plan." Cracker noted. "Maybe we can find somewhere to eat along the way. I'm starving." They both grabbed their jackets and headed out.

They exited the hotel and randomly selected a path to take. It was fairly cool outside, and a light breeze was blowing. Countless people were going about their lives with presents and other festive items in their hands. As the duo turned the corner of the busy sidewalk from the hotel, Cracker bumped into a young boy slightly taller than herself. His shopping bags fell to the ground. The boy was blonde with azure eyes and wore a white fisherman's hat...

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To be continued...

I really don't want to linger too much on just the two of us. This is a digimon fic after all. The real fun begins next chapter.

Yes, I know that Christmas isn't really celebrated in Japan, but for the sake of convenience let's just say that it is at least done on a secular level.

More from me once the evil exams are done...

As always, review and share your thoughts.


	3. Love is?

For the sake of [my] convenience, let's just assume that everyone can understand each other's languages!

The story's pace should pick up now, so enjoy...

Disclaimer: My parents have given me a leather jacket, a cellular phone and nice pair of shoes for Christmas, but I don't think I'll be getting ownership of Digimon anytime soon...dommage!

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"Oh, I'm sorry for running into you." Cracker apologized. She and Ominous helped the boy pick up his things.

"Interesting...I thought this only happened when she drives." Ominous muttered lightly. Cracker heard this remark and thrust a quick elbow to his side.

"It's alright." Said the boy. "I should have watched where I was going. Thanks for helping me pick up my stuff."

"No problem." Cracker smiled. The boy and the duo went their separate ways after saying goodbye.

"I'm amazed it wasn't me who bumped into him." Ominous stated. "Usually I'm the clumsy one."

"No matter, let's just find somewhere to eat." Cracker said. "Shall we walk around to find a place, or shall we drive?"

"Walk." Ominous uttered almost immediately. "I'd rather not tempt fate." Cracker rolled her eyes at him as they started searching around.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Eventually, the duo found themselves a quaint little restaurant with non-intimidating food, about ten minutes away from the hotel. Shortly after they ordered their meals, the door jingled open. It was the same blond-haired boy they had bumped into earlier. He sat at a table nearby with his shopping bags and slumped in his chair. His face appeared somewhat worried and tense. The pair looked at the kid, and then looked at each other with concerned faces. Ominous and Cracker both nodded in silent agreement as they got up from their chairs to talk to the child. The blond recognized the two and smiled.

"Hello, again." He said, cheerfully.

"It's quite a coincidence to see you once more." Ominous noted. "My name is-" A stray server slipped on a slippery section of the floor causing several dishes to collide with the ground loudly. "-but you can call me Ominous."

"Well that was odd." Cracker said as she glanced at the accident. She turned her head back to introduce herself. "My name is-" A second server tripped over the first and sent even more dishes crashing to the floor. "-but you can call me Cracker."

"Odd indeed..." Ominous added, as he momentarily looked at the pileup.

"My name is Takeru." The boy quietly said. "You don't look like you're from Japan."

"What gave it away?" Cracker joked. "We're visiting from overseas. Anyway, we were just sitting down to eat when we saw you come in with a stressed look on your face. Do you want to talk about it?"

"If you don't mind, that is." Ominous added in quickly.

"I'd rather not trouble you with my problems." Takeru stated.

"It's not a problem." Cracker reassured. "We love helping, don't we, Om?"

"Sure! Helping...interfering...it's all good, really." Ominous beamed. Cracker sweatdropped. "What's on your mind?"

"Well, it's kind of embarrassing, really." The boy replied. "It's about my best friend."

"This sounds serious." Ominous noted.

"What's your friend's name?" Cracker questioned.

"Hikari." Takeru answered. "We've known each other for as long as I can remember."

'_Hmm...I think I see where this is going._' The pair both thought.

"Tell us something about the two of you." Ominous requested.

"Well, as we were growing up, we were always being teased by our family and friends about how we were a couple." Takeru continued. "I can't believe I'm telling you this..." The older pair assured him that it was alright, so he continued. "At first, I brushed it off as an annoying joke. We both did." He chuckled lightly. "As small kids, I was expected to look out for her. Wherever she would be, I wouldn't be far behind, and vice-versa. We went through happy and sad times, laughing and crying along the way, and always together." Takeru then took a deep sigh. "As the years passed by, I began to see that our friends and family all noticed something that I never did before."

"That's wonderful." Ominous noted. "I think it's marvellous that a close friendship can blossom into such a deep love."

"There's a catch though, isn't there?" Cracker quickly asked. Takeru nodded.

"While I know how I feel about her, I do not know if she feels the same way." Takeru concluded.

"That's what I thought." Cracker uttered.

"I knew that." Ominous chimed. Cracker gave him a quizzical look. "What?" He asked innocently. "I did."

"Anyway, I bought her this necklace for Christmas, and I told myself that I would tell her how I felt as soon as I gave it to her." Said Takeru as he displayed a red, velvet box. He opened it up to reveal a sparkling gold chain with a pink star in the middle. Ominous and Cracker stared in awe.

"It's gorgeous." Cracker simply stated. Ominous nodded in agreement.

"Why a star?" Ominous inquired. Takeru blushed.

"Well, the explanation to that is going to be a part of my confession." The boy said. "To me, Hikari has always been this constant light in my life. She shone brightly for me when my world was dark, like when my parents divorced. She was there for me. She also brightened all my happier days with her presence and her smile."

"I can tell that you really care for her." Cracker said. "She's lucky to have such a good friend."

"Indeed." Added Ominous. "I'm certain that she feels the same way."

"I'm scared though." Takeru confessed. "If she doesn't feel the same way, our wonderful friendship could die. I don't want her to not be a part of my life."

"It can seem risky." Cracker began.

"However, I doubt that she feels nothing for you." Ominous continued. "From what I gathered, you two appear to have an unbreakable bond. I think I speak for me and my friend when I say that love always deserves a chance to bloom. People have sacrificed themselves and given up everything for the sake of love in the past, so why can't you do something similar?" Takeru thought deeply about this.

"Love is worth the risk." Cracker noted. "You should not repress your feelings; it's not healthy. Love is meant to be free."

"Maybe you're right." Takeru muttered. "I can't begin to tell you how much my heart has ached over this."

"How old are you, Takeru." Cracker asked next. Takeru gave her a confused stare. Ominous snickered at this.

"Don't worry, she claims to have attention deficit disorder." Informed Ominous. "I don't think she really has a serious problem, but she does tend to jump from topic to topic." Cracker blushed.

"Oh." Takeru murmured. "Well, I'm fifteen."

"Only fifteen?" Cracker said, puzzled. "You seem so mature for your age, and so sure about your emotions. That's remarkable."

"I concur." Ominous said. Takeru smiled nervously, and caught a glimpse of the time.

"Oh, I better get going or my mom will worry." Takeru stated as he got up from his chair. "It's been nice talking to you."

"Likewise." Ominous and Cracker said in unison. Takeru went to the counter to collect his food to go. He was about to exit the restaurant when he paused and returned to the table where the duo was still sitting.

"Excuse me again." Takeru uttered politely. "I don't want to seem to forward, but I'd like to repay you for your kindness and advice." Cracker and Ominous looked at each other in bewilderment. "Since you're not from around here, I can show you around the town tomorrow, and you can meet Hikari and my friends." The pair smiled.

"That's not forward at all." Stated Cracker. "We're grateful that you are offering to show us around. We still have much to learn and see."

"We can do it tomorrow." Ominous added. "I think me and Cracker need the rest of the day to get over the jetlag." Cracker nodded and yawned.

"Great!" Takeru exclaimed. "Let me give you my number."

The two parties exchanged their contact information and said their goodbyes. Takeru left with his food and purchases while the pair finally began eating their meal. They were glad to have met a new friend, and were even happier knowing that they helped a bit. One thing was for certain, though. They both knew that tomorrow was going to be full of surprises...

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To be continued...

My schedule is more arduous than I originally thought, which means that this story's end will be delayed a bit. However, it is now my priority story. It shall be finished before I focus on the others. Hopefully I can finish it before school starts again.

As always, review and share your thoughts.


	4. The Antics of the Crazy Bitch

Hmm...will I mention our names ever? Who knows! Although, mine is on my bio page.

If you are puzzled and/or shocked by my title for this chapter, then you are probably not alone! This is actually a long-running inside joke between the two of us, so no harm done. In fact, she practically _dared_ me to name it the way I did!

Disclaimer: On the twelfth day of Christmas, Toei gave to me: Twelve chosen-a-fighting, eleven marching fishes, ten spirits evolving, nine Digimentals, eight crests-a-glowing, seven Dark Rings-a-controlling, six D-Scanners-a-flashing, five digi-gnoooooomes! Four Dark Masters, three Digimon Tamers, two angel digimon, but no ownership of Digimon! Argh!

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It was the following day, and Ominous was browsing through some brochures and tourist guides as he was sprawled on the couch in his part of the suite. A small pile of more brochures was by his feet. There was a knock on the door dividing the two rooms.

"You can come in; it's open." Ominous called out.

The door opened and a somewhat tired, but dressed Cracker stepped into her friend's quarters. Ominous glanced quickly over his shoulder to see Cracker's state. He assumed she had not fully gotten over the jetlag. She had a frown on her face, and her eyes were squinting.

"Why is the sun up this early in the morning?" She asked in an annoyed groan. Ominous shook his head in disbelief.

"It's the afternoon, bud, didn't you reset your watch?" Ominous responded. Cracker mumbled something unintelligible. "Did you remember to take your pills?" He said casually.

Ominous was of course referring to the prescribed Vitamin B pills that his friend took to get energy to her brain, thus making her more attentive. Cracker was surprised that he would mention them. If the old idiom of looks that kill was true, the galaxy would have imploded by then, judging by the harsh stare she was giving.

"What's it to you?!" She shot back.

"I'll take that as a 'no'." Ominous muttered calmly as he went back to looking at the guides. "She needs a stronger dosage" He said under his breath.

"What was that?" She inquired in an overly-annoyed voice. She picked up a vase from the coffee table.

"Nothing..." Ominous quickly replied.

He was beginning to get frightened of his friend's uninhibited state. Tonight, he would sleep with one eye open. Cracker slowly lowered the vase back onto the table, but she kept her eyes narrowed on the young man.

"Did that kid, Takeru call yet?" Cracker asked more calmly.

"No, not as yet." Ominous responded with a light sigh. "They don't have holidays around this time in Japan. Christmas will still be a school day."

"Oh, right." Cracker apparently recalled.

"You knew about that?" Ominous questioned with one raised eyebrow.

"...Of course I did." She answered hesitantly. Her friend gave her a dubious look. "Don't look at me like that!" She exclaimed.

She quickly took some of the extra brochures and went back to her room in a disgruntled rush, slamming the door behind her. Ominous went back to reading the guides, and then briefly looked up after a couple of minutes to analyze what just transpired.

"She seemed rather agitated...even for her demented standards." He quietly murmured to himself. He rubbed his chin as he pondered. "It would probably seem logical to attribute her erratic behaviour to the woman's monthly, biological cycle, but I'd be wise not to discuss that with her...if I want to make it back home intact...and breathing."

He stared at the door to her room and shuddered at the thought of what unspeakable horrors Cracker could possibly be able to do to him. He was rethinking the idea of sleeping tonight, period. Keeping one eye open suddenly did not seem sufficient enough to keep him safe.

'_Why are all the small ones insane?_' Ominous thought. He turned on the television to calm his mind.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The pair had received a call from Takeru the next hour, and got instructions on how to get to his apartment complex. Once again, Ominous took the role of 'navigator', meaning Cracker was behind the wheel. The two found time to converse between directions given, as they were speeding recklessly towards their destination.

"Hmm, I wonder if the middle finger means the same thing here as it does back home." Ominous wondered as he saw his friend use the crude gesture for the second time.

"Well, even if it doesn't, there is still one thing I can think of that is recognized by all cultures." Said Cracker, colliding her enraged fist with the centre of the steering wheel. The car's horn blared at the poor driver in front of them who was driving too slow for Cracker's psychotic standards.

"This is an endless war for you, isn't it?" Ominous stated cynically.

"It's not my fault they can't drive!" Cracker shot back. Her patience was wearing thin.

"I find it highly interesting that you say that about virtually everyone." He said. "A bit ironic, too."

"Don't act like you don't drive like me, too." She jeered. Her eyes became determined, as she planned to overtake yet another vehicle on a road with no passing lanes.

"I may go as fast as you, but I do not go around gesturing to everyone that I come across on the road." He corrected. "For our sake let us hope that this vehicle is up to safety standards."

"Did Takeru tell you who he was bringing with him?" Cracker unexpectedly asked.

"He said that he was going to be with his friends: Hikari, Daisuke, and Taichi." Ominous answered. He sighed at Cracker's off topic nature. "He also says that Taichi is Hikari's brother, too."

"Oh, so we get to meet the girl that he loves." Cracker quickly uttered as she barely escaped flattening a pedestrian while inadvertently running a red light.

"You do know a red light means 'stop' in this country, too, right?" Ominous inquired nonchalantly as he gazed back at the intersection.

"You do know an uppercut to the jaw is painful, right?" Cracker threatened in the same manner. The young man became deathly silent.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

When the pair finally got to their destination, they noticed a small group of four kids waiting in front of the apartment complex's parking lot. It was Takeru and his three friends. One was a girl with short, russet hair. She had an air of innocence and warmth about her. The duo immediately labelled her as Hikari. One of the boys was bigger than the rest and had long and wild brown hair that matched Hikari's hue. The other boy was also a brunette, but his hair must much shorter and spiky, and a pair of goggles adorned on his forehead. Cracker parked in front of them in the visitor's parking spot, and the two stepped out to greet the kids.

Takeru's friends were a little startled by how tall Ominous was. It wasn't often that they met up with someone of that height. However, it was Cracker that sparked more of an interest...particularly for Taichi and Daisuke. They stared at her hopelessly with stars in their eyes as they envisioned her in a backdrop of roses and heavenly music. Ominous caught this and sweatdropped. He then fought the urge to laugh out loud as he thought about what those two would get themselves into if they tried anything.

Takeru smiled and waved to them while the other three bowed slightly. Ominous and Cracker followed suit and slightly bowed back.

"I'm glad you two could make it!" Takeru exclaimed cheerfully. He formally introduced his companions. "These are my friends: Hikari, her brother Taichi, and Daisuke." The three said their hellos casually.

"Allow us to introduce ourselves." Ominous started. "My name is-" A car horn blared in the street as it spun out of control, ran onto the curb, and crashed into a glass building. "-but you can call me Ominous."

The six of them turned to view the accident for a brief moment. Cracker and Ominous' mouths were agape. Something unusual, yet strangely coincidental was slowly becoming apparent. Nevertheless, they turned back to the introduction.

"My name is-" Cracker began.

As this was happening, Ominous' attention was oddly drawn to a gas station across the street. There he saw someone handling a hose while about to light a cigarette. His eyes widened in horror.

'_Oh, that cannot end well..._' He thought as he hastily put his hand over Cracker's mouth with lightning speed, denying her a chance to say her real name. "Her name is Cracker...leave it at that." He looked back at the figure across the street. The individual had wisely pocketed the cigarette. "I'd rather not tempt fate." Ominous lightly muttered. The group looked at him strangely.

"Okay..." Cracker finally said, unsure of what just happened. "So...any ideas on what to do today?"

"We're going to show you around Odaiba, if that's alright with you guys." Takeru responded.

"That's fine with us." Stated Ominous. "We have lots of time on our hands."

"Very good." Takeru beamed. "Our 'guided tour' will probably take several hours. Taichi and Daisuke planned it out, and they did a good job of it."

"Which is surprising, considering that neither of them are good at planning things on their own, let alone as a pair." Hikari joked.

She took a small step back and looked at her brother and Daisuke in anticipation of some sort of reprimand for her personal shot at them, but it never came. Both Daisuke and Taichi maintained their fixed gaze on Cracker. Hikari walked up to them and waved her hand in front of the two. No response. Cracker finally caught on herself, and chuckled nervously as she backed away a few steps.

"Are we ready to go?" Cracker quickly inquired. Takeru nodded.

"Shoot!" Kari said suddenly, a hint of frustration illustrated on her face. Everyone - minus Taichi and Daisuke - turned to face her. "I just remembered that Mom asked me to go to the mall today to purchase Dad's gift for her. I can't go."

"Are you sure?" Takeru asked with a mock pout. Kari jokingly slapped his shoulder and nodded.

"I'm sorry, Takeru, but I have to get this done." Kari replied in a disappointed tone.

Cracker and Ominous were disheartened to hear this. After their discussion with Takeru the day before, they really wanted to see them together. They had to think of something quickly. Out of nowhere, an idea came to both of them. The pair looked at each other simultaneously and gave the other a sly smile. They were both thinking the same thing.

"Well it would be a shame if Hikari had to go alone to the mall, Takeru, so maybe you should go with her." Cracker stated. Ominous silently smirked.

"Well it would be nice to have some company." Hikari noted.

Takeru was trying his hardest not to blush. He could tell that Cracker and Ominous were both inwardly snickering at this. However, they did provide him with an opening to spend some time alone with her. He just had one more concern.

"Well what about showing you around our city?" Takeru questioned.

"That shouldn't be a problem." Answered Ominous. "You said it yourself, Taichi and Daisuke planned this day out. They can show us around, if that's alright with them." They turned to face the pair, who were still awestruck by Cracker. "Is that fine by you guys?"

They nodded blankly. Cracker placed her hand on her face in disbelief and gently shook her head. She wondered what her friend had talked them into. Both Taichi and Daisuke raced to wait by the car.

"Alright, so I guess me and Hikari will see you all later." Takeru concluded.

"Watch out for those two." Hikari warned in a whisper. "Together they cause more trouble than they're worth."

"If anything, _they_ should watch out for _her_!" Ominous chuckled as he pointed towards Cracker, who was slowly walking back to the vehicle. He couldn't see her face, but he knew that there was no way a pleased expression was present. "We'll see you two later, then."

Hikari and Takeru said their goodbyes and headed off together towards the shopping centre. Ominous made his way to the car to see Taichi and Daisuke arguing about something.

"...No, Daisuke, she's sitting in the back with me!" Taichi exclaimed.

"There's no way she'd sit with you, Tai!" Daisuke retorted. "She'd rather sit with me!"

Ominous sweatdropped as the bickering continued. He could not believe that they would be fighting about this so openly in front of her. Ominous then looked at Cracker. She had a frustrated and impatient expression on her face, and a vein was becoming visible on her forehead. As the arguing pair continued their verbal war, her expression was becoming more infuriated. Ominous quickly got into the car behind the wheel, fearful of what his friend would do.

'_Those two have a lot to learn about women._' Ominous thought to himself as he started the engine.

"She's not even your age, Dai!" Taichi yelled. "Why would she-"

"Enough!!!" Cracker wrathfully interrupted. "The two of you will be sitting in the back with each other - end of story!"

The two boys were taken aback by this admonishing. They both saw the blazing hot fire contained within her eyes, and knew that she was dead serious. They quickly piled into the back seat and fastened their seatbelts. Cracker got into the car and buckled up as well.

Even though Cracker had been so cross at the two brunettes, they were still viewing her as some sort of deity. They continued to stare at her with twinkling eyes. They dared not make her upset again, so they toned down their 'worship'...though not by much.

"So, where are we off to first?" Ominous asked the two.

They briefly snapped out of their trance to explain that they were going to take them to a seafood restaurant by the pier, which was halfway across town. Ominous carefully memorized the directions given to him. As he was about to change gears, Cracker put a hand on his shoulder to get his attention.

"Drive as fast as possible." Cracker whispered to him. "Maybe we can scare some sense in them. If not, then at least I won't have to bear this for long."

"You know I always do." Ominous smirked as he winked back. '_Heaven save those boys from her impending wrath...and their probable doom._' He mutely prayed as he reversed the car, changed gears, and floored the accelerator.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The four of them got to the harbour's parking area in a record amount of time. After they found a spot and parked the car, Cracker and Ominous stepped out of the car in a very casual manner. Taichi and Daisuke shakily unbuckled their seatbelts, grasped the handles of their respective doors and slowly opened them. Their hair was standing on end even more so than before.

"Is this how you drive all the time?!" Taichi yelped as he staggered back and forth for a bit.

"Yup!" Admitted Ominous cheerfully. Cracker sniggered as the two boys facefaulted.

"I wouldn't even call that driving." Daisuke added, trying to maintain his footing. "It was more like flying. Everything passed by so quickly."

"Well once you two finish pulling yourselves together, let's get to this restaurant." Said Cracker. "I'm getting hungry."

"Me, too." Ominous commented when his stomach gently gurgled. "I have a craving for crab cakes."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Meanwhile, at the mall, Hikari and Takeru were taking a small break from shopping and were currently sitting at a table in the food court. Takeru seemed somewhat distant to Hikari, and she was growing a bit concerned.

"Takeru, is something wrong?" She asked worriedly. "You look like something's troubling you."

"Nothing's wrong." Takeru replied, snapping out of his daze.

"Are you sure?" Hikari inquired. "You know you can always tell me what's on your mind."

"Thanks, Hikari." Takeru smiled. "I know I can confide in you." Hikari smiled back.

'_Perhaps this is a good time, but it's too risky._' She thought. '_I don't want to lose it all._'

"You know, I don't say this often, but I really am lucky to have such a good friend." He stated.

"Oh really?" Kari joked. "Care to tell me who this person is?"

"Wouldn't you like to know!" Takeru chuckled as he winked at her. She lightly kicked him under the table in a joking gesture.

"Actually, what I would like to know is how Ominous and Cracker are fairing with Taichi and Daisuke." Hikari mentioned. "I feel so sorry for those two; they're going to get a bad impression of Japan!"

"I just hope they don't cause any mental scarring for those visitors!" Takeru added.

They both laughed out loud, getting odd glances by passers-by, but they did not care. Today they were just Takeru and Hikari: best friends. If anything, the pair new that they would always have each other in friendship, despite their fears, despite their hidden feelings - despite anything. Friendship would always remain strong within the two.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"...cause I'm hopelessly devoted to you!!!" Taichi and Daisuke crooned in their less than ideal singing voices, pointing to their crush.

The four of them had driven to a karaoke bar after their meal at the pier, and some sightseeing. At the moment, both Daisuke and Taichi were attempting to serenade the unimpressed and mortified Cracker, who was sitting at the table with her face covered. Ominous was also at the table, trying not to fall off his chair from the amount of laughing that he was doing.

Cracker's fury was subtly building and rising as the singing continued. She was greatly tempted to order a full bottle of sake to relieve her stress, but she now had a malicious plan, which would only be thwarted if she drank.

"You're taking this rather well." Ominous noted, wiping the tears away from his eyes as he finally calmed down.

"There's a time and a place for everything, my friend." She uttered enigmatically. Ominous looked at her curiously. '_My vengeance will come soon._' She thought. A wicked smile began forming on Cracker's face.

"Uh-oh..." Ominous quietly stated. He had an inkling as to what his devious friend was planning. '_I can only hope she doesn't cause any mental scarring for those two._'

Taichi and Daisuke finally made it back to the table, smiling from their performance. They asked if Cracker liked their little show, but the girl said nothing. She just smiled. The brunettes took it as a good sign, but Ominous knew better.

"Wow, it's getting late." Taichi noted as he checked his watch. "We better get going."

Cracker's grin grew wider as she swiped the keys from Ominous' hands. The four of them headed out of the bar and to the vehicle.

"I'll be driving us back." Stated Cracker icily. She got in the car and turned on the engine.

"I was afraid of this." Ominous muttered with growing concern. He turned to the two boys. "Brace yourselves."

"What's the problem?" Daisuke asked. "After being in the car with you behind the wheel for today, I think that me and Taichi can handle anyone's driving."

"Oh she's far worse than me." Ominous stated in a tone worthy of his name. "I'd suggest buckling up rather tightly."

Taichi and Daisuke gave each other a shocked and terrified look as they slowly got in the car.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

At the mall, Takeru and Hikari were getting ready to leave. Suddenly, Takeru coldly shivered.

"Why did you just shudder like that?" Hikari questioned.

"I...don't know..." Takeru replied in a puzzled tone.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The Suzuki raced down the road with little abandon. The tires screeched hotly on the asphalt as the smell of burnt rubber filled the air. Cracker had a maniacal look plastered all over her face, and Ominous was just shaking his head slightly. He felt sorry for the two in the back. Taichi and Daisuke were holding tightly onto anything they could grab.

"You forgot to take your pills when you packed to come here, didn't you?" Ominous calmly asked. Cracker just laughed out loud in a sinister fashion as she cut off yet another driver.

"What's wrong with her?!?!" Daisuke screamed out in terror. "She's going to get us all killed!!!"

"It must be her time of the month!!" Taichi added in. His life was flashing before his eyes.

This exclamation only made Cracker drive faster. She ran another red light once more while extending her middle finger at an adjacent vehicle. This time, her breaking of the law was more intentional.

"Where are the police!!!" Daisuke yelped. "Someone save us from this crazy bitch!!!"

Cracker developed a creepy sneer on her lips as she pushed the car even faster. As she turned the corner, she nearly turned an old man with a cane into a street pancake. Nothing was going to get in her way.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Back at the apartment complex, Takeru and Hikari were waiting for the group to come back. They were startled when they heard screams and the sounds of a revved engine coming from around the corner. Suddenly, the Aerio bolted into the parking lot and came to a screeching halt several feet in front of them. Hikari and Takeru sweatdropped.

Cracker and Ominous got out of the car in a unruffled fashion, and opened the back doors. Taichi and Daisuke slid out of the car and they both fell to the ground shuddering. Takeru and Hikari looked at the scene wide-eyed and quickly walked up to the four.

"What happened to them?!" Takeru and Hikari shouted in unison.

"She did." Ominous simply replied, pointing to a smug Cracker. The young lady had her arms crossed and looked down at the two cowering boys with a satisfied smirk.

"Will they be alright?" Questioned Hikari as she gently prodded her brother.

"I'm sure it's nothing that a few years of heavy psychiatric help won't fix." Ominous answered coolly. "When they come to, tell them thanks for showing us around. Me and Cracker have to go."

Takeru nodded slowly and waved goodbye to the older pair as they headed out. He and Hikari helped to pick up the two hapless boys.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

When Cracker and Ominous finally got back to their room, the two were fairly exhausted from their long day. Ominous plopped down on the couch and turned on the television while Cracker got something to eat from the small fridge.

"Well I hope you're happy with what you did to those two." Ominous said, disappointed. "They may never fully recover."

"Actually I am pretty happy with how that went." Cracker corrected him in a complacent tone. "It serves them right for trying all that crap."

"You know, you've been acting rather irritable today." Ominous stated. "Any reasons in particular?" Cracker quickly looked back at him.

"Of course I have a reason!" She retorted, squeezing the bag of macadamia nuts in her hand. "I'm not going to be able to see _Smallville_ today! Do you know how pissed off that makes me?!"

She went back to looking through the fridge. Ominous began flicking through the channels, and noticed that some of them were in English.

"I think this hotel gets satellite." He mentioned. "That's so cool!"

He kept on turning the channels until he came across a familiar program. There on the screen was a teenage Clark Kent using his powers to get out of some sort of trouble. Cracker slowly turned around. She would recognize that voice anywhere. She squealed in delight to see that she could watch her beloved _Smallville_.

"Get out of my way!!" Cracker screamed, startling her friend.

With great speed, she made a short sprint to the couch and tackled Ominous out of the way. She quickly grabbed the remote from his hands, and got into a comfortable position on the couch.

"Hey!" He yelled. "What's your problem?! This is _my_ partition of the room, and-"

"SHUT UP, OR GET OUT!!" She roared with passion. Ominous took the hint and went silent. "No one, not even God himself, will interrupt me when I'm watching this!"

At that moment, the phone rang next to the couch. Cracker was enraged by this interruption and answered the phone with a furious greeting.

"Hello there." The deep voice on the other end said. "This is God-"

"No time for you, old man!!!" Cracker hastily interrupted as she slammed the receiver back on the hook with unholy force.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The prize coordinator, Godfrey Smith, was puzzled as he stared at his receiver. He was calling to personally congratulate Ominous and Cracker for winning the trip to Japan. He slowly hung up the phone.

"What the hell was that?"

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To be continued...

-Yes, the holidays are over. Yes, I do take long to update. I wish I could work faster, but given my hectic schedule, things get put on hold. I apologize for any inconveniences.

-This story seems to be very conversational, don't you think? Well, at least this chapter was longer.

-Wow...there was swearing within the story! Now that's something you don't see from me! Let me check outside to see if there's a blue moon, solar eclipse, or some other rare, celestial phenomenon taking place.

-As you can tell, my associate, Cracker, is quite the character to say the least! I would tell you all to 'be careful', but that would be a _huge_ understatement! If you think I embellished her tendencies and character, then I am sad to say that you are wrong! (I can almost see her review now as I write this!)

-Making Tai and Dai have a crush on Cracker was an idea of mine since I began this story, but she thought I was only joking. Wasn't that deliciously evil, or what!

-You might question the fact that me and Cracker are friends. I would answer: "Yup, we're good friends!". Heh, what can I say? We're both a bit...out there!

-The next chapter should be the last, and will have more takari. Until next time...

As always, review and share your thoughts.


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